WN’s Family Guy – Signs pointing to an early spring for youngest daughter

By on August 4, 2014

Don’t let the heat and humidity fool you. Spring has sprung early for the Ball family, and love is in the air.

The absence of school allowed us to get away and enjoy some time with friends. A couple weeks ago we traveled to Philadelphia to stay with one of my wife Leslie’s best friends from childhood and her family. They, too, have six children of similar ages to ours.

And so we enjoyed a week of all the relaxation that flows so naturally when you place 12 children ages 13 and down under one roof with four adults making their best attempts to minimize damage.

In truth, it was an enjoyable outing with many peaceful moments as the kids all got along really well. There was lots of swimming in the pool and even more jumping on the trampoline and day trips checking out the sights and tastes of Philly.

All of the children seemed to pair off pretty naturally finding the one in the other family who was closest in age to them. One pair, however, got along too well.

My perfect Haley Mae, headed to kindergarten in September, became quite captivated with one of their boys. I’m really not an overly protective father, but I could see something dark and brooding lurking behind his broad smile, disguised under his mop of blonde hair and hiding behind his bright blue eyes. After all, he is almost a full year older than our little angel. What can a five year old little girl possibly have in common with a six-and-a-half year old almost man?

I first spotted trouble while walking down the hallway passing by their home office. The door was open just a crack and I could hear some muffled noises inside. My detective-like senses alerted me to just stand still beside the door and find out what could be heard with my keen radar.

No luck decoding the noise, but I could clearly tell it was mischievous, so like a coiled spring I flew through the door to catch the unsuspecting culprits. Sure enough it was my darling Haley Mae and this soon-to-be first grader who will go nameless. They were sitting on a pile of pillows and it seemed likely that they had been holding hands.

I asked them a few Sherlock-esque questions, but this kid was good. He didn’t break. I darted out of the office and up the stairs to alert Leslie to the findings of my investigation. For some strange reason she didn’t appear as alarmed as I was. Maybe she was just trying to keep a cool exterior. Leslie played it as if she was almost dismissing my concerns. It was like she thought I was overreacting. Sometimes she is so coy.

What I didn’t realize is that she was about to perform her own interrogation over a couple cookies and a glass of milk.

It was actually my dear Haley Mae who started with the questions.

“Mommy, will you be my grandma when I get old?” Haley asked.

“No. I will always be your mom,” Leslie answered. “But I will be your children’s grandma someday.”

This logic perplexed sweet Haley.

“Well, where are my children?” she asked.

Leslie explained to her that she needed a husband first.

Haley got quiet for a minute, but then a huge smile brightened up her face.

“I have already picked a husband!” exclaimed Haley Mae, as she named the little blonde bandit I had happened upon in the downstairs study.

From that moment on in the vacation, I took control of assigning partners for every activity. And somehow I always had a free hand to walk with my precious Haley Mae.

Spring may be just around the corner, but it will be a hot summer’s day before my kindergartener gets married!